BAGS OF CHIPS WITHOUT ENOUGH CHIPS IN THEM
Review by: Tony Shitbag

What the fuck? Put some chips in my bag you motherfuckers! I’m sick and tired of buying bags of chips with only 3 chips in them. I didn’t buy this bag as a collector’s item and I don’t particularly enjoy paying for a sack of air. You better put some baseball cards or lottery tickets in this bag if you expect me to feel like I got my money’s worth you lasagna pounders. I want chips! You pieces of shit know damn well that there is plenty more room in that bag. Fill it up you mud soldiers!

Lays and Doritos - you guys are the worst! Why don’t you just sell bags of dicks? There should be enough chips in each bag to satisfy one pudgy chubbafruiter. There aren’t enough chips in your bags to satisfy a starving Ethiopian kid. Those dirty children in the sad commercials with flies on their faces would laugh at you if you offered them one of these stupid bags. I’d rather eat the air bag in my car. I hate you motherfuckers.

I hope you get a bag of Santa’s cum for Christmas you chip Hitlers. Slap some more crunch in that bag! I hope you all die so I can bury you in green sour cream chip coffins you boner chewers. I need at least four handfuls of chips in my bag or you will all get four handfuls of shit smeared across the faces of your children. I will wrap this chipless bag around my dick and fuck the shit out of your wives! Don’t test me! I will roll into you house like a tub on wheels looking for things to scream at and rape. Just give me my chips. That’s all I ask.

Posted: 01/13/08